Podcast for Singers
Overcoming Fear to
LIVE LARGE - Unapologetically!
Join your painfully honest, humorous, big-hearted host, Fearless Singer Mel Lathouras, to talk about what’s holding us back from living our creative, musical dream lives.
We will undo untrue narratives that stop us from singing and expressing ourselves fully, creating our dream projects & music businesses. And talk to absolute bosses who are doing this work and succeeding.
Let's rise together!
Episode Highlights
Jaimie joins us to share her insights on the world of paid speaking work and how Singers can tap into this lucrative avenue of creativity and income.
Discover the surprising demand for speakers and the impressive earnings potential, with some making anywhere from $5000 to $30,000.
In this episode, you'll hear Jaimie's captivating story and gain valuable insights into:
✨ Transitioning into full-time business
✨ The power of authenticity and being true to yourself
✨ Uncovering aspects of your own story that you wouldn’t think people would want to hear about
✨ The selling power of relatability
✨ Embracing fearlessness and letting go of the fear of rejection
✨ Plus, Jaimie's surprising journey into deadlifting and her impressive lifting achievements!
You won't want to miss this conversation that will galvanise you into exploring the paid speaking world!
Also, if you want help getting started with a highly converting strategy – check out Jaimie’s course Paid to Speak Course, which closes Tuesday: Paidtospeak.com.au
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CHECK OUT FEARLESS SINGER SCHOOLTranscript
Mel Lathouras 0:00
We get a welcome to our episode 26 of the Fearless Singer podcast, I'm really excited to introduce Jamie Abbott. Jamie is an absolute gun. And she helps people get paid speaking gigs, from all walks of life, it doesn't matter what background you have, there is a niche there. And there are people wanting to hear you speak and, and I've got Jamie on because we just had an episode this week on singers navigating our current financial crisis at the moment. And Jamie's here to go, actually, oh, my god, singers, this is a perfect opportunity for you to put paid speaking, or, you know, as part of your income stream? Because there are, Jamie, tell us about it. There are government corporate agencies just begging for speakers at the moment. And you've got this fantastic programme, which we're going to talk about as well. So paid to speak. So yeah. Thanks so much for being here. I'm so excited because I just admire the shit out of you. I just love everything that you do. And it didn't. We just discovered too, that we've got similar backgrounds in journalism and communications. And I'd love for you to talk about how you transitioned from full time working, you know, in those areas to now you're creating your own full time creative business, helping other creative people
Jaimie Abbott 1:29
get up. Yeah, actually. So first of all, so clearly allowed to say the word sheet on this.
Mel Lathouras 1:33
Absolutely. You can if you want.
Jaimie Abbott 1:38
Well, actually, no, you don't know these, but we have even more similar backgrounds than what you might realise because I was a singer as well. Yes. Yes, I sang in bands, musical theatre background sang for my HSC and I grew up in Newcastle, which is where I still lead now and very, a lot of talented singers. I was in the thing called starstruck, which is kind of like school spectacular. I don't know what.
Mel Lathouras 2:05
Yeah, yeah, we have that. Oh, not starstruck. But we have the school spectacular.
Jaimie Abbott 2:09
Yeah, right. Castle version of that. And I was saying in that and then oh, you name it? I've Yeah, I've been. You know, I was in Greece. The musical. I played Rizzo. And I've Yeah, background, but I wasn't there's so much talent in Newcastle alone, let alone Australia wide worldwide. And I just didn't have the vocal ability to carve out a career. So instead, I chose journalism.
Mel Lathouras 2:33
I also chose journalism.
Jaimie Abbott 2:36
Yeah, I know, it's so simple. I was such a similar. Yeah, so I'm really happy to be here. Thank you, and you joined pay to speak you want to ask.
Mel Lathouras 2:45
So I just a little bit of a background, Jamie did a, like a kind of a light version of pay to speak. However, it was not light at all. It was packed with value. It was like only $50 By the way, thank you for charging in Australian dollars. I was just like, Oh my God. And, and the amount of value in it. I was just like, Okay, I'm doing it. I'm, I'm gonna commit to this. Because yeah, I see it as a real opportunity to also not just to obviously make money. I think that's a big draw card for a lot of creatives, but to be able to share your, your mission with and get yourself in front of new audiences as well.
Jaimie Abbott 3:25
Yeah, absolutely. So it's like a little challenge that I ran, and so many people jumped in, because they could see straightaway the opportunities that are out there. And I truly believe that Mel that there are more speaking opportunities out there, then there are speakers. And once you get into this world, you realise that because you you'll do one of these lucrative gigs. And then someone in the audience will come up to you afterwards and say, that was amazing, you know, they're going to fall in love with you. And they'll say, we've got an upcoming event, can you speak at this event in two months time, it's our strategic planning day, our budgets 10,000. And you wouldn't get that opportunity unless you were there. And then it just flows on like dominoes from there. And so I'm really passionate about teaching people how to get paid to speak what topics sell, because I think and like creatives, you know, having had that exposure, most of my childhood and into my early 20s in musical theatre and all that sort of stuff, semi professional. I've seen bands all around regional New South Wales while I was at uni, I feel creatives have this tendency, and I'm pretty, pretty confident in saying this, that we don't charge our work, saying, We you guys don't charge your worth. We do too many things for free. And we're and we only fall into that trap mill of thinking, Oh, it's great exposure or you know, it's it's a great opportunity to get in front of this audience. But there's only so much you should do of that. And there comes a point where you think well, actually the organiser of this event whether you'd be singing or with BB in a band, whether you'd be a keynote speaker Uh, it's very similar. They they're the organisers and making money off you being the draw card. So you should be charging. And I learned that the hard way actually, it was December 2021. You know, you know this story now. But I was asked to speak by a corporate client. And I had no time I was a local politician. So I was a counsellor in New South Wales. And I was getting off counsel, I wasn't going to run again. But my other half was running as we had an election campaign, we had two little toddlers. And this corporate client asked me to speak for a full day. And because I had no time to do it, I just charged them a ridiculous amount. And I'm talking $30,000. So that was the quote, and I knew full well, they would say no, but I, I couldn't fit it into the shedule. Anyway, it took 46 minutes. And they hit except on that quote, and so
Mel Lathouras 5:54
it's my mind. Yeah. And I mean,
Jaimie Abbott 5:57
I tell the story so much, they're probably listening to it, they're going, oh, goodness, you know, it was just such a landmark moment for me because I realised shit. I've been under charging all these years. And I've been telling my clients to charge and I'm saying, I would have probably charged three to 5000 Max. I don't know why people probably would charge less than that it was a day trip to Sydney and back, actually, it ended up being online as well, for a full day. And I just made a decision there and then to never speak or anything like that, again, for less than 10,000. And it's amazing. Now I'm in a whole different world. I mean, 18 months later, now I have that mindset. Now I know what clients are happy to pay. And I haven't looked back.
Mel Lathouras 6:41
Oh, good on you. It's such an empowering story. And I can imagine, there'd be a lot of singers and musicians who listen to this podcast, who, you know, were flat out getting $150 for three sets, you know, that that's a reasonable, you know, amount. You know, hearing that and going wow, at that, that money is just out of our realm of possibility, you know, so thank you for, for Yeah, bringing that world. And I and also to a lot and you're 100%, right, a lot of musicians play for exposure, you know, and it's all about getting in front of, you know, the new audiences and all the rest of it. But there has to be an energetic exchange, really, you know, and money is just that, isn't it? It's just, it's just energy.
Jaimie Abbott 7:35
Absolutely. Yeah. A lot of people who are listening and you got a lot of listeners, by the way, you sent me an email with your podcast downloads thinking it was nothing. And I'm like, wow, that's actually a lot. Really? Yes. Yeah, I'm not gonna I won't say what the number was because the people listening to this, it's just going up and up for your podcast. But even I will do anyone's podcast, by the way, I've just done I don't even on a tangent. But people who come to me and they'll say, I'm just starting out, I'm only getting a they might say 20 downloads. To me, that's like the equivalent of having 20 people in the room. And so that's worth doing, you know, that's 20 people who've got a captive audience, yours is much higher than that. But I just don't I just think it's still worth doing. Even if someone is just recording their podcast the first time it could be five people that listen to that first episode. That's five people I get to pitch to. But another question a lot of singers and other creatives who are listening to this might be wondering is what can I talk about? And you'd be surprised things that you think no one gives a shit about, people would lap up even, I mean, something which, you know, even just the experience going through COVID, we heard a little bit about it in the news about, you know, gigs being cancelled, and you know, financial assistance, and they're not being enough attention given to help Creative Arts. I know, in New South Wales, that was a big hot topic where I leave in that state. And but even just hearing that perspective, to a layperson who's not involved in the industry, people are happy to and want to hear that that's really interesting. And so things that you think I was just part and parcel of our lives of our businesses, don't discount that sharing stories is going to connect audiences going to entertain, inspire and motivate them. And that's what my course is all about. It's about, let's extract these newsworthy topics that are going to sell that you're going to be able to easily pitch and it's using information and content that you already have up in here in your head. You know, things that you've gone through lessons that you've learned, anything that you can share with even other up and coming artists who might want to shortcut the system and not make the same mistakes you made. There's value in sharing that and that's definitely one of the common questions I get asked or the feedback I get asked is I've got no story or what am I going to talk about? And it's just a matter of just thinking actually, I've got this story in us. It's sitting right underneath you and you never thought was of interest to an audience but it is.
Mel Lathouras 10:02
This is a perfect leeway in to tell us your story. How did you start? Because I know that you've got a journalism background, I heard that you you got started very early as a journalist, you're 20 and working for a very popular New South Wales radio station. So talk us through your journey from journalism into the corporate comms space and then a counsellor as well. And then and then when did you decide, okay, I really want to just focus on, you know, building my, my mission, my community, and going full time Jamie Abbott paid to speak?
Jaimie Abbott 10:41
Well, yes, I mean, there's also a B component in there, which is still a part of my life, and that's the military life. So I'm in the Royal Australian Air Force Reserves. I have the rank, the rank of Wing Commander, which is a senior officer rank. So I've done a lot of things. So yes, I started when I was 20. I guess I've always been pretty ambitious mil. In the fact that I remember getting to university and I went to Charles Sturt University in Bathurst and I went straight from school basically, at 18. And I remember looking around the room, I don't tell the story very often, actually. But I went, I remember looking around the room in the lecture hall. And there was about at blond blue eyed, gorgeous size six women who all wanted to host getaway. And they were my fellow students. And I thought, wow, should I look like them? You know, I'm a size 16 Six foot I suppose size 18. Back then I don't look model material for TV to be on getaway. So I made a decision there. And then that I would just go everywhere and do work experience because I knew was coming into a competitive world. I wanted to get into television at the time. And that's a very still ease. But even back then it was more you saw a lot less variety of people on TV. It was the blonde, Channel Nine gorgeous women. They're still out there now. And they're very good journalist too. But it was just very image focused. And so when I went everywhere and did work experience, I did not party at uni. So I went to channel seven, Channel Nine, channel 10. ABC. Today's tonight and just trying to get a foot in the door. And I really sacrifice my uni years, which is a bit sad. But I got a job at two GB radio when I was 20. And I hadn't even finished uni yet. I was in my third year and I was driving for those in New South Wales who listen, I was driving from Bathurst in central west New South Wales to Sydney pretty much back and forward and I would read the news overnight to GB radio on a Friday and Saturday night, I'd start my shift at 9:30pm. And I finished at 5:30am. And then I paid a friend of a friend of a friend 40 bucks to crash on their couch, near the Sydney Airport in other suburbs, Brighton le sands as the suburb, I remember it vividly actually. And then I would turn that cup on the Saturday night do the shift again, reading the news on the hour. My last bulletin was 5am. And then I drive back to Bathurst about three hours drive and do it all again. And so I worked really, really hard. And then I before I even graduated from uni, I got a job in TV. So I was doing some casual work at prime TV, which is kind of channel seven local news in orange, which is still central west New South Wales. Then I got a full time job at in Tamworth, that prime TV, just channel seven local news now, which is the country music capital of Australia. And I spent three years there on the road as a reporter got to present the news, present the sport present the nightly updates. And that was incredible because I was covering everything. I was 21 When I started, I just turned 21 And I left to GB and I was covering the drought, politics, country music festival, floods, you name it and learned locust plagues. And I learned a lot about a variety of things. And I got really interested in politics at a local level. And then I went to work as a political staffer following that, and then joined the Air Force. So that was 2007. Was that Kevin? Oh seven. Yeah, I was working as part of the Howard Government, as a ministerial staff were attached to a local federal MP. And then I joined the Air Force Reserves. My sort of politics didn't win the election. And so I just went straight into the Air Force after that, and that was at the end of 2007. And so we're talking 16 years ago, I spent six months in Afghanistan as a head media trainer, and really coming into the Air Force. But that PR media background was just great. And I'll be the Air Force of the day I but they kicked me out in a compulsory retirement age. But I loved it. And then I came back from Afghanistan, and I've ran for the federal state of Newcastle and had an 18 Month campaign as a 29 year old by the stage. That was 2011. And then, so she doesn't live I came back from Afghanistan yet and I turned 30 The year after that. 2012 Yeah, that's right. I'm gonna take myself back now. Great. uriens being a candidate made lots of mistakes, you name it, I've done it. I've been heckled and not handled it. Well, I've mastered my message. I haven't mastered my message. I haven't responded to the questions. And I was doing national TV interviews as a 29 year old. And I was in a running for sighted politics that's never actually had the seat since Federation in the state of Newcastle. And that was great experience. It was it was hard as a 29 year old female, I guess you could say, I was seen as a conservative, but I'm from the left side of my party, that's fine. I'm not really involved in politics anymore. To be honest, I've kind of lost a lot of interest. But I was involved in if I was from the left side of politics, but I was still running for a seat that wasn't in holding the seat, you know, so the majority and I didn't come anywhere near to your seat. But that really gave me a lot of resilience. I met some incredible people. So people who were really struggling, and were able to help them through things like NDIS. And then I also got to meet the people who were achieving academically and in sport, doing amazing things. And so that was great. After that campaign is when I set up my media training business that was 10 years ago now 2013, and loved it ever since. And I've gone back into politics, I got elected as a local councillor, I was an elected spokesperson. Then I had another tilt. When I gave birth to my first child, I was a state candidate, as well, once again, mill lots of mistakes, bottled them all up to teach people. And then after that, that was four years ago, that's when I kind of started speaking, I thought, I've got the military experience, I've got the political experience of being a journalist. I've got enough here to kind of present a workshop and then turn that into a keynote. And that's another piece of advice I give people. If you're delivering workshops, that's a keynote, you've got all the material there to just package that up into a 45 minute keynote, and then did a bit of paid speaking here and there. And then 18 months ago, boom, the 30k speaking gig happened. And I then created the course over the next five months after that showing other people how they too, could become a paid speaker. And here I am.
Mel Lathouras 17:03
Amazing. Long response. No, I love it. It's, I think, Oh, look, it is such a gun. Honestly, from early age. Where does that steeliness come from? That kind of Alright, let's get in there and just do this. And in that, can I just say to so brave, as well, you know, and which is, you know, you know, my business is fearless singer, you know, putting yourself out there like that, that that was huge, especially as a 29 year old, where did you get and also going to Afghanistan? Where does that bravery come from?
Jaimie Abbott 17:44
I don't know actually. mean, nothing happens to me that I can think of, but I've always been, I'm getting really personal. And I've always been a larger girl. Like, I've been up to a size 22 And then all through my teens, I was a size 18 You know, bigger. So never had any boyfriends was always the funny one. You know, I wasn't I don't know. And I think and I remember I used to get teased or attempts were made me to get teased. I remember I was in year nine science, a card of high school I went to and this kid turned around to me and he said you're fat. And I just gave it back to him. I'm like to say the F word. And so yeah, I just like ever since then, I just kind of never let that get to me. So I think it kind of just happens naturally. And I also was involved in performing arts. So to be honest, like if you asked me while I'm confident, and while I'm an extrovert, I was in the equivalent of Johnny young talent school, but was joining on talent school, then it became like, got sold or had different names. And I was as a face to tap dance from when I was about seven to 12. And then when I was about 12, I auditioned and got into this elite part of Johnny on talent school was called the young stars Talent Team. And we travelled all around New South Wales and I would always be the emcee. And we were intense. You know, you caught up and grown up in a talent school, dance school, you know, you getting changed in your leotard your fishnet stockings, and you go and performing shopping centres and, you know, we travel away and performance shopping centres, I can, you know, up the coast. And I think that really gave me confidence, having that experience as a performing arts person, putting myself out there for the world as an emcee. And as a singer. I do a bit of dancing. I was more a singer at the front and have dancers behind me. I think that really helped and then it was still as a journalist, you still kind of a performer, you know. Really, yeah. Yeah. And then, but what's really interesting like I you know, being a conservative female in a in a Labour party town, I've certainly had lots of blogs written about me and maybe one woman wrote an entire blog devoted to my fat face. Yeah, it was pretty nasty me probably wouldn't get away with it now, but this was 11 years ago and lots of comments that my parents but I never have really got to me because I guess I thought it was fair game. But in the last, I don't know, six months. And if you follow me on socials, you'll see my marketing is really intense, like lots of reels, lots of talking heads, lots of showing up and doing stories. I've never had so many comments about my appearance ever. And even when I was in TV and radio, being an online person putting yourself out there. I mean, it's kind of backhanded compliment, or insult or say, Oh, where do you get your Botox from? I don't get Botox, but I've no problem with people who do that. They'll ask comments like that. Or they'll say, you really don't need to use that many filters. You don't need to be over filtering yourself. And I feel like saying, Well, shit, I'm turning up on Instagram, and you're not so yeah.
Mel Lathouras 20:44
It was the Brene Brown quote about you know, you know, don't don't worry about the people who aren't in the arena. Yeah,
Jaimie Abbott 20:54
it's interesting. And you'll, you're gonna go down this route, I know, because we're in the same her Empire Builder, you know, mastermind mattina tower together. And the whole idea is you put yourself out there, you show up, you document you go live on Instagram part of building your personal brand. But it does come with criticism, and well does for me. And that was probably part of that because people are used to seeing me as a conservative politician, toeing the line. Even in a as a military, they're very conservative role. So types of professions and cultures. And in the last 12 months, I've just really let that go. And I've just been completely myself. And so I think a lot of those people who watch my career, they're like, What are you doing? Why we've got this weird filter on your eye? Why are you dancing? And I'm like, Well, this is me, I'm having fun. So I think a part of that is getting criticism from the past people. But you also attract your tribe as well. But my point is, I think I can see why a lot of people hold back and putting themselves out there online because of that fear of getting criticised.
Mel Lathouras 21:55
The other night, I did this story, as I go, I'm always on stories all the time, I try to keep be consistent with my feed. But I must have looked arranged, I was holding this cupcake. I just went and put these cupcakes of a good friend. And I was talking about rejection. And I don't know whether it's the fact that I'm turning 40. But for whatever reason, rejection is so fucking funny to me. Like, I think it's hilarious. Because of your advice in sprint to stage I was like, Okay, I'll reignite my LinkedIn profile, you know. So when fix it, put that on the speaker on there, and I think it's so hilarious that you can request to connect with somebody, you can see whether that person has checked out your profile, but decided not to connect with you. And it is maybes, I was just I was in stitches. I thought it was hilarious. And I actually I pitched for a gig a while ago now and at the school that I used to teach at, and it was hilarious. The lead teacher that had you know, asked me to do it was like, devastated for me that I wasn't, you know, the kids didn't want to do my workshops. And he was like, you know, I'm really sad for your mate, you know, feel a singer sounds great. And, you know, and but only one kid signed up, and I just absolutely erupted in laughter he's like, What do you mean? Like, Oh, mate, it's just business. So you know, that's hilarious. Oh, and I think, by the way, don't we I just want to tell you that I had the similar experience as a kid so I've, you know, been part Greek. I've always you know, food is our love language. Yeah. It's great for you too. Yeah. I've always been the bigger kid. And when I was 14, I was probably the biggest I've ever been in my life. And I also had a mullet. I had a fucking mullet before it was even popular because some hairdresser in Bundaberg decided that it would look good and I my mum and I just didn't really have the skills to go Oh, can you fix that? You know, and so yeah, I was walking around, you know, 90 kilos, you know, at the time, I'm short with this big foxy mallet and would get teased and I think it's also been a blessing like I it just I just don't think there's anything anyone could say about me that would upset me. You know, it just it's the same thing. It's like it's it's all been said and it's all been done. But yeah, I got very good at telling people to fuck off as well.
Jaimie Abbott 24:29
Yeah. You and I've got you and I so similar to what we just connected when we first. Yes, I love hearing the stories. But isn't it funny how people like you and I have taken them we're like, oh, it's water off a duck's back now whatever. Other people it can really destroy them. Well,
Mel Lathouras 24:47
I think it's, it's that isn't just the real primal fear of being kicked out of the tribe, you know, that does kind of end. So if you've been kicked out of the tribe, you know, it's like well And you've survived. You know, you dislike war, there's nothing anything anyone can do or say, I think I'd be offended if you said something about my mother. But you know, you'll also get a sucker punch to the bloody you know, tip well, Dick
Jaimie Abbott 25:17
I guess the point is you never going to please anyone and then sadly, taken me this long to realise this, I think I spent my whole 20s Trying to be accepted, not be rejected, you know, got dumped by men and took it hard and took that as a rejection and it is a rejection. But I think I've now learned at 40 I'm never I'm in my friend Jen Bowers, who's in her Empire Builder. She uses this quote all the time, and I'll credit her but I've totally stolen it. You're not going to be everyone's cup of tea, but you're sure as hell someone's shot of vodka. And I love that. Yeah, I'm like telling everyone was what is kindness my own, but I'm credit her now. She's still very fresh. And she told me. But yeah, there's so much truth in that not you never going to please everyone. And it's the same when I give public speaking training advice. People get nervous about, oh, they're gonna think they're gonna think they're gonna think you know what they're gonna think about me. And at the end of the day, you can't control what everyone is going to think. But you got to focus on those people that are there with an open mind to be educated, inspired and motivated by your talk. And you're never going to please 100% of the audience anyway. And so I think at 40, I now accept that, you know, people meet me all the time, especially like, over the years in the military, they'll make me be like, What the hell? Because I am out there. And I've worked in a public affairs role, where they're very traditional secret squirrel, just do they operate. They're focused on their job, and I'm here, I'm trying to push him to promote what they're doing. And yeah, some people embrace it. And then my people that other people go back off, you are too much. And I think so many of us, particularly in the creative space are told, but I love this podcast and tell them about things I've never spoken about, Oh, awesome. We are told things that you're too much, you too much. And you're not too much. You might be too much of that person, that person is not your tribe. They're not your customer, they're not going to employ you for a gig, they're not going to employ you for a coaching session. And so I think don't ever hold back from being who you are. And I'm a great example of that in the last 12 months, when I've let go of how I look. Yeah, I've put filters on because it means I don't have to put makeup on or I can show up, I'm showing up, do whatever it takes to show up. But I'm still being my authentic self. When I whatever I say, I'm not worried about Oh, am I allowed to say that? Is that something that liberal parties told me not to? Or? Or is that a defence thing? I can't I'm just totally being me saying what I think you might be not liking what I have to say, I don't care someone out there, I'm going to be helping and inspiring and changing their life. And it's sad. It's taking me this long, but I'm glad I realised at 14 rather than 60.
Mel Lathouras 27:57
Yeah, good on you. And I just think, you know, that is, oh, gosh, I think also too, okay, so you, you have your own service that you teach people when you go in to do workshops, however, that in itself, just that, you know, I'm just going to be me is so powerful when you show up in that space, you know, even without even communicating it, you know, in that elicit way like just you being that is giving people permission around you to be more of themselves. So true. absolutely want
Jaimie Abbott 28:31
to share this story. I caught up with a guy who's in the military last night. Well, just because he's going by pay to speak and he was creating an image is he's listening to this. I'll tell him Listen, he's creating an amazing charity, helping first responders and veterans to overcome trauma. So PTSD, to do it to do it. So martial arts Yeah. And so. And like, he was very at the start of this meeting, he was very serious, and you know, very military focused. And I guess 10 years ago, I would probably just, like, conform and be similar to that being, you know, straight face professional not being myself. I went straight into that meeting last night. So I was reflecting on it afterwards, completely being myself. So dropping the F bombs when I wanted to laughing inappropriate jokes, totally me. And it took him one glass of beer. And he was totally the same then. Because at first he was like, What is going on? And then he was relaxed. We were laughing. It broke down that barrier. And I just think it's so true. What you just said, you know, the minute you are yourself, it allows other people to be relaxed. I mean, it could have gone the other way he could have been like you're too full on as a result. No, he came to a breakfast a business breakfast with me this morning is coming to a military dinner in the community next week. You know, he's like, wow, I want to you know, I want to be part of this entrepreneurial world and, you know, meet some amazing connections and, you know, he's very entrepreneurial focus, but I never would have broken down that barrier as quickly if at all, if I I tried to put up some sort of front thinking that's what I had to do, because I'm military and he's military, that makes him
Mel Lathouras 30:05
100%. It's like, people just want to be accepted, don't they, we just always just want to accept it. So if you are demonstrating, I accept myself, well, then you just, you're also accepting the other person who's in front of you, and, and they feel accepted. And I'm just going to keep saying the word accepted over and over and over again. I just also want to reinforce Jamie. Honestly, I'm so glad that we've had this chat. And I'm so glad to know you because I just think you're incredible. He's such a beautiful, kind. Funny. I love that you're so ambitious as well. And I love that you're just an absolute gun. You know, everything that you do. I've just, honestly, I've been fangirling you for a little while you intend to tower on my to our end Denise dt. Oh, yeah. You know. I love you, I love you girls. You're like my rock stars.
Jaimie Abbott 31:04
Oh, thank you.
Mel Lathouras 31:07
No worries, it's how I feel. And I just want to also reinforce that, you know, so I signed up for the paid to speak course, made, it is amazing. The amount of it's just this, it's so comprehensive, you know, it's like literally taking you from point A to point B, you know, there's not lift anything out. And it is just a matter of and you've just given so much like in terms of the templates.
Jaimie Abbott 31:38
Yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, thank you for saying that. There's certainly never been criticism from anyone saying there's not enough content, there is a lot of content, that's why give everyone 12 months, but yeah, I am over delivering and you've got all on if you've got the plan as yet. And the bonus section is 10 massive PDF planners and you're like, Yeah, and so some of those are 60 pages. And I would you know, charge a couple $100 for those alone and they're just very they're taken hours and hours to put together but I'd rather over deliver because you know, you're going to achieve results smell you're gonna go and get speaking gigs and
Mel Lathouras 32:12
my praises My, my, my goal is I want to at least have like in the next month, I want to book a $5,000 gig. And by the way, I'm going to also I'll do things by myself but I also have a colleague that and she's a music therapist and we want to join forces as well and do things but I kind of also want to coach her like well does you know I'm sorry I should encourage her to buy the course actually yes you should I'm when I say Coach I mean encourage her to also do her own thing. But yeah, I just I was blown away by the level of content and and I have to say too, I jumped in because I was just I knew by your like your light version that oh my god if this is the lite version the paid you know, the bigger version is going to be amazing which was but yeah, you've got payment plans as well which makes it super accessible. So thank you because you know, especially as a full time creative singer that's Thank you for having that as a strategy in your pricing or Yeah no worries it's super inclusive. Thank you
Jaimie Abbott 33:17
I do I pay a lot of things on payment plan Yeah. Yeah, I mean a lot of people this time round are doing that plan because at the end of the financial year, but it's only like $100 or something or if you do that payment plan Yeah, yeah and it just makes it so much more full you don't notice that there's much coming out of your bank account I do a lot of memberships and and courses where I do do that as well I just find that really easy and accessible to a lot of people depending on their budget
Mel Lathouras 33:44
so that's called paid to speak and people can find you at WWE dot Jamie abbott.com Did you want to spell your name?
Jaimie Abbott 33:52
Yeah, sure. Well actually even easier than that mill that can go to page www dot paid to speak to you and that will take you straight to the course but my website will also take you there which is just Jamie ja i am i e, avid a there will be no double t.com or.au will get you there.
Mel Lathouras 34:11
As you're doing them like me, you can just literally write that in iMovie sorry. Oh, we'll do that as well. But you know, it's good to have it spelled out Yeah, definitely. I'm
Jaimie Abbott 34:20
sure you put it in the show notes or something. You just Google my name Jamie Yeah, but even if you spell it wrong, you actually I Googled paid to speak and it comes up on top of Google so you can easily find me done yeah, yeah. And
Mel Lathouras 34:33
also to our please follow Jamie on Instagram and Facebook because her rules are phenomenal. They're full of value as well and they're funny and quirky and cool.
Jaimie Abbott 34:45
Example of just this course I've just completely let go of any worries about what people are going to think I'm just I just posted one before I came on here with me in a bathtub. I did one where it looked like I was naked originally. I thought why Should and I had my 21 year old friend Jess who's like my litmus test. And she said, No, it's a bit unprofessional I'd use the one of you in the bathtub with a dress on. So I did kind of limit that there was an only fans promo or something.
Mel Lathouras 35:16
That could be a side hustle. Yeah, yeah,
Jaimie Abbott 35:18
I was I was really gonna post it, then she's like, can achieve what you want while still being in the bar. But with your dress on. You know, I'm just completely being quirky and funny and not worrying. And I know I have a lot of my friends who this is all new to them. They know, conservative, very straight. Well, I mean, behind the scenes have always been, you know, funny, and like dropping inappropriate jokes and lines and stuff for those who know me, but a lot of people who are kind of on my outer circle, but Facebook friends of me, I might have met them at an event or worked with them in the past. They're a bit sort of shocked. And I've had comments, you know, to them to my partner who's come back to me saying, Oh, they're like, What the hell is she posting? What the fuck is she doing? You just go well, she bad luck. I'm selling courses.
Mel Lathouras 36:03
My Yeah, my whole thing is, it's just been a real new discovery because I think I held myself back a lot with content, but also even my stage banter as well, because of, you know, offending friends and family. And I've actually just gone well hang on, your friends and family don't book in for sessions with you. They don't pay you money. And you know, and like, they're not your ideal client, then or your ideal, sometimes not your ideal audience member either. Like sometimes no offence to my beautiful friends and family. I love you so much. But, you know, but you don't make content for them. Exactly. You make content for, you know, it's going to be an extension of who you are and who you want to serve. It's always gonna be about that relationship. You know? Yeah, that's
Jaimie Abbott 36:52
you'd really articulated that. Well, actually, Mel, I like that. Someone said to me, one of my mentors, at the beginning of this year, I was at a retreat on the Gold Coast. And she said, business is not about you. It's about the people you serve. And that can take so many meanings. A if you're just always talking about yourself all the time, you're making that about you. And B if you're not showing up, because you're worried about what people are going to think or you're worried about your nerves and fears or worried about being rejected or making a mistake, you're making that about you. And you're not focused on the people that you have to serve. And so if you are talking about yourself and sharing an amazing story, you want to have a takeaway of a lesson learned or something that's you know, in it for them for the audience. When I saw Jana Pittman, who is an Olympian, she was in Summer and Winter Olympics, actually amazing woman, she was on shs Australia, she's got six kids in anonymous sperm donors with two of the kids. She's now a GP. So he's been always attrition. Like she is phenomenal. This woman, oh, my goodness. And she just got up and told stories. But all of those stories you could relate to, like lessons learned, such as she backed up here. And that she got over it and turned back up. And then just but you know, she weighed herself on national TV on SBS Australia, she got so many more fans from that, because so many women who've had kids or pelvic floor issues could relate to that. And it's just just by sharing these stories, she's still made it about the key takeaway. So what she learned and what we all learn from that. And so that's really powerful. And that's making it about the audience whilst telling stories about yourself. So I'm
Mel Lathouras 38:28
just laughing at telling a story. And the key takeaway is, I am awesome. Thank you very much. Yeah, we've seen that. Yeah. Oh, me, too. I've been a full time high school teacher and I've sat through many PD, you know, at the end, you're just like, why don't you just come and teach my classmate? You clearly, way better at it, you know? Anyway, look, I'm just a bloody delight. And I just want to say it. I'm going to say something about your appearance. And I know it's not appropriate to comment on women, but I think you bloody beautiful. You look like Joan Crawford. But Joan Crawford, when she was young. Oh, yeah, that's, yeah. And also to I'm really impressed by your gym stuff, like, I just can't get over it. How do you like, is it like 200 kilos that you can lift?
Jaimie Abbott 39:24
No, one day. 135 kilos was really weak. And I've just come from never deadlifting before, so I only started deadlifting. In February, I went and saw a physio. Dave Renfrew people paid to speak. Dave Renfrew, who owns Newcastle performance physio via Newcastle, go and see his team and literally they just set up a programme for me. I went in there and lifted and did squats and they kind of knew my apple weight and they just said a programme on an app and I just go to the gym and do it and every week I increase my weight by five sometimes 10 kilos. Today I'm going to the gym and I'm aiming for 100 40 kilos Oh, yeah, I mean, and I in my head want to get to 150 I need you. And that's my goal. And I just love it and I share it even though so many social media experts, including many I look up to, they'll always say don't share your food and don't share your gym workout don't show kids. I do limit the amount of stuff I share with my kids. I do share a little bit but not much. But I share that stuff in the gym. A it has the most amount of engagement be I've now inspired others. So there's a somebody might one of my masterminds in New Zealand and then another one in Canberra, they're now dead lifting as a result, we're all competing. The one in New Zealand hit 120 kilos this week, and she's catching up to me. And three, even if you're not into that people see it as inspiring, you know, I'm setting goals I'm achieving, and I find that really, really powerful.
Mel Lathouras 40:50
I have a very strong resistance exercise, which I'm working on, but it's inspiring to me it is unlike here it is a powerful, strong woman, you know, and that does that energy alone. That adult that again, I'm like, it feels galvanising does that so yeah,
Jaimie Abbott 41:07
I'm so glad I came on this podcast. So as I've talked about things that I've never talked about, I'm getting like all goosebumps be like you just making you feel freaking awesome.
Mel Lathouras 41:15
I have a bit of a love bomb, but not for any like sinister purposes. I just do it. It's just, you know, I just feel I just think if there's some really like obvious things about people, we should always just tell them.
Jaimie Abbott 41:27
Y'all do that enough. Do we know and there's always that fear because
Mel Lathouras 41:31
of you know, we've been learning all these psychological terms now where you know, you always think oh, no, I hope that person doesn't think I'm love bombing them. And I'm like, No, I hope that person knows that. I'm loved bombing them. Yes.
Jaimie Abbott 41:42
All the time. Even though I was I went and got this coffee before I came into this podcast. And I saw this girl the best freakin butt. Like beautiful. She's obviously sculpting away everything at the gym, whatever, because I've got a really flat butt. And so I looked at that, but Well, inspo just loved to say to her, you've got one of the best, but I wanted to tell her because I honestly thought she looked beautiful. If someone
Mel Lathouras 42:07
said told me I had a nice butt. I'd be pretty stoked. I wouldn't care who it was
Jaimie Abbott 42:11
back because I thought oh, she might think
Mel Lathouras 42:15
two blokes behind me once the couple of bogans Sorry, I'm gonna be classes, like it was in my 20s Because I've always had a very protruding balm. Walking down George Street in this, this guy goes scuze me it looks like there's two possums trying to break out of a bag. And they're referring to my bum and I turned around and went, thank you. Oh my god. And I think that was a reaction that they want else like, you know?
Jaimie Abbott 42:45
Awesome, sort of break out of the bag.
Mel Lathouras 42:48
That I was like, mate, that's the best thing I've ever heard. I know you're trying to like put me down. But that was really fucking funny. I should have said Oh, would have been stoked, especially if it was another woman. You know, if you're sort of, you know, balding, you know? 60 year old man. Oh, yeah, guys. Not all not all. balding. 60 year old men. Sure. I mean, yeah. Appreciate it.
Jaimie Abbott 43:15
I have a friend of mine. He's sick today. And I saw him this morning. He was a big business breakfast. He was there. And he's sick. And I sent him a message there. Have you okay, you look really sick. And he wrote back something like, Are you saying I'm fucking ugly? And say, actually, no, you're really attractive person. You look hot. But then you hold back and you think oh, yeah, coming on to him. So I think that's I think we need to come to a bit of a happy medium there where we are giving praise where it's due without having any hidden agendas.
Mel Lathouras 43:47
No, that's it. My Yeah, my agenda is always just like, it's just about sharing love. It makes me feel good. Like, you know, it is I guess it is. It's not altruistic, because it it does. The moment that you acknowledge something great about another person, it just makes my whole like, I can feel like it's an explosion going off in my chest, you know, and I get excited by people success. Like I do I get really genuinely. Um, you know, I just think, oh, god, look at it go. You know,
Jaimie Abbott 44:17
we need more people like you, because I find a lot of people not not a lot, but there are people out there who get jealous of that. Even if doing actually I've been trolled. So the physio refer to Dave Ramsey. Myself, we've actually been trolled a little bit with people emailing me and him saying, Jamie Abbott wasn't actually deadlifting 135 kilos conveniently couldn't see the
Mel Lathouras 44:43
EU just paused. Like not that ill,
Jaimie Abbott 44:47
but I'm not in some sort of competition or anything like that. If I still got
Mel Lathouras 44:52
you Yeah, you just pause this. Oh, yeah.
Jaimie Abbott 44:55
I don't know what happened. Yeah.
Mel Lathouras 44:57
It's, it's that's just people can be He's so strange, but I always say actually, it's so funny my one of my dear friends that I used to live with years and years and years ago, she just messaged me a quote that I had said to her years ago as a little 20, something year old. And I think this captures captures the essence of what we're talking about. I said, Don't kick a dog when it's down. Usually a dog that kicks a dog when it's down is a dog that is down. Oh, yeah, maybe I thought that that was way more inspiring than what it actually is. But anyway,
Jaimie Abbott 45:34
reading that then, yeah, yeah.
Mel Lathouras 45:37
There was a post that I put up on my Facebook apparently using his cheat sheet.
Jaimie Abbott 45:42
No, there's definitely so many.
Mel Lathouras 45:45
You know, people that do put up people down and clearly not happy, you know, and that's really sad. But also to Jamie, I just want to reframe the fact that you've been trolling as in like, high five, you've reached a success,
Jaimie Abbott 45:58
but it's trolling from the fitness people like they are. You know, how on Instagram, when you put a real app, you can see on a little triangle that at the amount of times it got, she gets shared? Yeah, yeah. So one of my last deadlift videos, and it was 135 kilos, one last week got shared, like 11 times, but I can't see who shared it. But I think it must have got shared into some group or other people's stories, who are fitness people, and all different fitness email addresses and sort of names were like, emailing or on my chat on my website, asking random questions like, What injuries did you have? And, you know, that's very fast. How come I can't see the weights? And just weird stuff like that? I think they're genuinely fitness people who? Well,
Mel Lathouras 46:41
that's just so bizarre. Yeah, anyway, um, so I'm just, um, well, you know, you're just a successful strong woman, in literally stone work, you can actually and, you know, keep doing your thing, honestly, and I'm just so grateful that you came on to share all your expertise. And I think if we just had to sum it up, singers, and creatives can go and get paid speaking gigs, they can see there's a performance, they can share their stories, they can talk about anything from how singing and music can be, you know, great for mental health and well being to talking about their own journey through COVID. And people are willing to pay for that. And I think that's what an empowering, you know, a message to give someone who might be going, oh, shoot, I haven't been paid for that gig yet. You know, to be able to take their focus away from that, and then start building this, this new stream of income, but also a news. Let's see it as a new creative project. You know, it really is. So thank you so much for coming on and sharing that I really, honestly really appreciate you.
Jaimie Abbott 47:56
Oh, anytime, thank you. And doors are open until Tuesday, if paid to speak. So if people want to go to that pay to speak.com Donate you, you can join as well only open the doors twice a year. I do like a limited launch won't open the doors for eight days, then close them. But you get 12 months access. So if it's not the right time now and you think I'll have some free time and maybe July or August, you can buy the course now when the doors are open, and they just take your time to get through the content.
Mel Lathouras 48:22
Absolutely. And like I said, I can 100% vouch it's worth every single dollar.
Jaimie Abbott 48:29
All Thank you. Thanks, Mel. I appreciate that a lot.
Mel Lathouras 48:31
Awesome. Thank you so much for coming on.
Jaimie Abbott 48:35
Thanks for having me. Have a great weekend. Bye
Transcribed by https://otter.ai